Since you asked...

Dear Miss Gribble,
My best friend owns a cottage in northern Michigan. Every summer, she invites my family to spend a couple of weeks with them. I always make sure to help with laundry, dishes and food when we visit. I've come to know many of the summer residents and look forward to seeing them.
Months ago, my friend invited me for a week in early August because she wanted my help with some event. Two days before time to arrive at the cottage, I saw my friend at a party, and she said she no longer needed me that week and I'd be up anyway a few weeks later.  I totally understand that it is her cottage and she can invite or uninvite whoever she wants. However, I planned my summer around this week and turned down other opportunities. Her telling me two days before seems so callous that I've decided not to go back again. It's like I've lost my best friend, and my heart is breaking though.
How do I deal with this? Please don't tell me to talk with her. I'm not a good communicator.
Sitting at Home in Michigan


Dear Sitting at Home in Michigan,
You are interpreting this much more harshly than you need to. Your friend probably has no idea that you restructured your summer around her cottage invitation and assumed it was no big deal for you to skip that week. By not returning, you are depriving yourself of a wonderful experience. Either tell her it hurt you that she canceled at the last minute, or let it go and pretend it never happened.
Miss Gribble


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Dear Miss Gribble,
Is it odd to eat with one hand in one's lap? I didn't realize that I did it until my fiancé’s parents mentioned it to me at a dinner. I later realized that every person in my family eats the same way.
My future in-laws say they have never heard of such a thing. My grandmother says it is good table manners, and I have no intention of changing. What do we teach our (future) kids?
Properly Taught


Dear Properly Taught,
Teach them the proper table manners that you were taught. According to Emily Post, by the time a child is 12, he or she should have learned to "sit with good posture and feet firmly on the floor throughout the meal. (And) Keep free hand in lap when not cutting food or passing items."
Miss Gribble


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Since You Asked …. "Men have singled out women of outstanding merit and put them on a pedestal to avoid recognizing the capabilities of all women." H. Shaarawi